BANGKOK

14th - 18th June 2015
The 1am flight from Columbo to Bangkok was a complete success. Three seats each and a few hours kip gave us just enough strength to work out the route from the airport to Banglamphu (Bangkok's old town). We managed to get an air-con room with ensuite bathroom and wifi for eight quid a night at the Lucky Guesthouse. After a doze and a pàt tai we were off to Asoke to meet my old boss Pierre who used to own HGV Design. He shut up shop after I had been in London for one year and went to work for a large branding company out here. He always said if I was ever in town drop him a line, so five years later I did.

We went for a drink in a bar near his condo surrounded by towering skyscrapers. It was great to catch up and introduce him to Helen, plus the beer in Thailand is a lot better than the beer in Sri Lanka, India and Nepal. He introduced us to his partner called Nit. She was a really nice lady and had a good long chat with Helen, whilst me and Pierre caught up on life since HGV. They took us to a restaurant called Cabbages & Condoms for dinner. The owner wanted to address Thailand's rocketing population and realised accessible birth control and sex education was the answer. C&C believe birth control should be as easy to buy and talk about as your grocery shopping. A life size condom Santa Claus greeted us as we entered and various other cheeky condom posters were dotted around the place. The setting was beautiful, fairy lights and hanging plants covered massive trellises stretching up into the sky, plus the food was amazing. Pierre and Nit ordered for us as both me and Helen were a little lost amongst all the good looking stuff on the menu. It was a lovely night and great to catch up with an old friend. Pierre told us he had joined a rock covers band that play every Friday and Saturday night near by, so we made a plan to stop by when we come back through Bangkok.

The following day was tourist day. The sleepless night train across Sri Lanka to Colombo mixed with the few hours kip we snatched on the night plane to Bangkok meant we had quite a late start. We were awoken by a sharp rapping on the door followed by a lady's voice saying in a long drawn out tone "you stay won mor niiiiiiight". We shouted back "yes won mor niiiiiiight " and she shuffle off down the corridor. Our first stop was Wat Phrakaew (Grand Palace), home to the Emerald Buddha (made of jade). 

The amount of temples, demons, gods, and other religious paraphernalia in the palace grounds was staggering. It was interesting seeing the different styles of temple and learning where they came from. Three completely different Buddhist stupas illustrated this perfectly. One was Sinhalese, one Cambodian and one Thai, each built / decorated in a completely different style. 

We joined a free English speaking tour to learn a little about the palace. The great thing about this tour was the guide. His english was pretty hard to follow and he kept wanting to give us life advice. We all just ended up nodding and smiling at each other! Best tour ever! The headline act was going to see the Emerald Buddha. High up surrounded by gold, jewels and all kinds of Buddhist stuff was a one foot high little Buddha, it was only a fraction smaller than Helen who claimed it looked quite big. It was a bit like going to see the Mona Lisa not knowing it is the size of your average tea tray. 

After the Palace we went in search of Wat Pho (Temple of the reclining Buddha) which was a short walk away. The Buddha was 15m high and 43m long, too big to really capture in a photo. This wasn't helped by the long thin building erected around it which pretty much does everything it possibly can to stop you seeing this magnificent statue. 

We wondered around the temple complex for a while, the mosaics around the buildings and stupas was incredible creating a beautifully jagged skyline.
 

Toilet door sign in bar by river.. Your guess is as good as mine.

After a walk / beer by the river, we decided to grab some street food. The street food stalls were beginning to pack up and we dropped our sticky plates into an open plastic bag next to piles of black bin bags, however it wasn't a bin... A lady ran over and we quickly learnt we had covered all her stuff with sweet chilli sauce. After a lot of broken apologising we fled to the 24 hour flower market feeling super guilty. It was a hive of activity and colour, plus it smelled amazing. We wondered around for a couple of hours and bought some Thai sweets. The peanutty one was amazing, I'm not sure about the pastel coloured spongy ones, let's say they tasted as interesting as they looked. (see pic)

The next day we decided to take a long tailed boat trip around Bangkok's old waterways that sneak away from the big main river. Some say it's the Venice of the East, we say they haven't seen Venice. Either way it showed us a whole other way of life, away from the crazy hectic streets of the city. Best of all our boatman had a dog called Bai To who joined us for the trip. He was such an awesome dog, quite often I missed important sites because I was too busy photographing or playing with him. 

However I did see some crocodiles slyly eyeing us up from the banks, some little floating shops and many houses on stilts pretty much 100% over the water. It was a slow, quiet pace of life, except when other dogs on the banks saw Bai To, who would smugly stare at them with a cheeky cock of the head as we floated on by.

In the afternoon we walked to a temple on a hill called Wat Saket also know as Golden Mountain, via one of the most delicious pork buns ever to exist on the face of the earth. We also passed the Democracy Monument which marks the start of four massive main roads that lead out of the city to the countryside beyond.

After lots of bell ringing, gong gonging and step stepping we reached the top. The view over the city was beautiful, from the skyscrapers in the west to the waterways in the East. 

We ambled along Boriphat Road heading south from the temple. This road is home to a large group of artisans. Carpentry stalls and workshops line the street and in the side roads and alleyways, dedicated Buddhist monks spend many years mastering the art of hammering out metal singing bowls.

Near by was a little restaurant which had gained the grand title of best pàt tai in Bangkok, obviously we had to check this out. It was closed but opened in the evening. With our lunch plans scuppered but our dinner plans sorted we headed off into China town in search of some street food. We walked down this tiny covered alleyway between two big buildings to find an explosion of Chinese everything. Lanterns, paper umbrellas, spices, waving lucky cats, unidentifiable foods. It was all pretty crazy and hectic so we dived into this little restaurant, similar to what you might find in Brixton village. It was a simple little Dim Sum place and the pork buns were fucking amazing. Ed if you're reading, it just about beats that place in Camberwell and is a fraction of the price. 

We wondered down one street where you could buy practically anything. Stalls selling guns, knuckle dusters, swords and ninja throwing stars were squashed up next to stalls selling sex dolls, dildos, whips, Viagra and various other drugs. I wasn't sure what to make of it all. Helen turned round with a puzzled expression on her face and said "are we running out of duct tape?". I guess she didn't know what to make of it all either.

After wondering the maze of tiny streets that makes up China Town we headed for the land of sky scrapers for a spot of western shopping. We had spotted a H&M and needed some basics. Our destination was to one of Bangkok's many malls, there are hundreds of them all next to each other along side the sky train. This particular one was called Terminal 21. You had to walk through security and were greeted by a pilot at the entrance. The girls at the information desk were dressed as air hostesses and each of the eight floors was themed around a different city with various props and appropriate shops in-keeping with the floors theme. It was a crazy place and seemed very popular. The Tokyo floor with all the boutique fashion stores was particularly bonkers. After heading to London to buy my usual 2X black and 1X yellow H&M basic T-shirts (traveling ain't changed me yet, no hippy pants and hessian tops for me) we were off to Rome in search of swimwear for Helen. 

That evening we went hunting for some nice bars that were not catering for the tourist crowd. Similar to some of the bars you might find in Dalston or Hakney in London, it was where you would go out if you lived in Bangkok. We had dinner in this little restaurant called Opposite. It was pretty expensive as the food was a fine dining take on Thai street food. However it was bloody tasty, better than any of the street food we had eaten (which is also very good). 

Over the road was a little bar called WTF apparently meaning Wonderful Thai Friendship. It served craft beers, was nicely decked out and had a relaxed calming atmosphere, plus they played good music. 

The two floors above are used as an exhibition space, curated by the owners. We wondered up for a nose. The theme was 'Friendship' and all the work on show was not by professional artists. It wasn't the greatest exhibition if I'm honest except for one piece. There was a little area made to look like a dressing room with a clothes rail at the centre. People were encouraged to swap an item of their clothing with something on the rail, then fill in a little tag to leave behind. The highlight was a small curtain for trying on clothes behind called the 'exchanging room'... Get it! I left a spare top from my bag so H could walk away with a really cool looking cropped blue shirt. It looked really good on her, but we both felt a tad guilty about leaving behind a simple white top (not the cleanest either). 

We went back to the bar for a drink, and then the heavens opened. I have never seen rain like it. The barman said the two alleys either side of the bar flooded the other night and we should probably get a cab whilst we still could. We did, and got very wet in the process, running bare foot up the road which was now a river, it was really fun. When we finally flagged a taxi he would not put us on the meter and wouldn't budge on his silly price. It was pissing it down so we wouldn't get out but negotiations on price had reached a stalemate. We had all the time on the world, so it was his time he was wasting. Eventually he cracked and came down in price. We won the battle... but lost the war, as the price was still a lot higher than it should have been. Still we soaked his clean white seats. Consolation prize ! 

He dropped us back at the famous pàt tai restaurant we attempted to have lunch in. What was once a deserted collection of grimy black shutters was now a bustling hive of activity. Every table was full, there was a small queue outside and the smell was amazing. Similar to the place in China Town, it felt like a unit in Brixton village, only more popular. Helen ordered a traditional shrimp pàt tai and I ordered the special which came wrapped up in a paper thin omelet. It was bloody good, we both could see why they had gained such a reputation and definitely is the best we had eaten so far. However I still can't decide weather it beats the one I had in A-Bay in Sri Lanka. Controversial!!!

When we got back we found we had a message from Bhrett who we trekked with in Nepal. She was getting into Bangkok the following day. We quickly changed our plans and decided to stay another night. Everyone loves a reunion.

As Bhrett wasn't getting in till mid day we went off to find a shit hot brunch cafe, and boy did we find one. It was called Crepes&Co and is a pretty well known breakfast spot in the city. They had a special brunch menu where you ticked off all the items you wanted a little like the tick box lists you get with Cluedo. First you chose a hot drink, then a type of fruit plate, then a type of fruit juice, then cereal or musli with yogurt, then three different types of bread from English muffin to croissant, then your style of eggs with a selection of sides such as bacon, mushroom etc, then your choice of pancake and finally another hot drink to finish. It was ridiculously good but we could hardly move after. We even pushed back our meeting Bhrett plan so we could digest a bit.

It doesn't really seem like you have properly seen a city until you have gone to the top of a massive building. So we arranged to meet at the Baiyoke Sky Tower (Tallest building in Bangkok) complete with revolving outdoor platform on the 84th floor. It was wicked to see Bhrett again, we three had become really good friend on the trek helping each other through all the highs and lows. She even got stuck with us for her birthday in a tiny guest house in the middle of nowhere at over 4000m. After lots of hugs we boarded the ear popping lift and sat in front of a cracking view reminiscing about our Himalayan adventure and sharing stories of the months following. 

After a number of revolutions, we were back at ground level ears fully popped. We took a speed boat along the canal back towards our guest house in the east. It went at an alarming speed bouncing all over the canal, it was great! We also managed to fit in another giant (32m high) Buddha (Wat Intharawihan) on route.

That evening we pottered round a night market on the river bank. We got there a little early so had beer in a near by bar on stilts slightly overhanging the river. A Thai band were playing as we arrived and even though we hadn't a clue what they were singing about, it sounded good and made a great atmosphere. 

We wondered the night market for a hour or so then decided to head to the infamous Pat Pong street associated with the darker side of Bangkok. Within seconds of arriving seedy men surrounded us trying to get us to go to ping pong shows and had laminated lists of various other let's say unique sounding shows. We thought it would be fun to see a lady boy cabaret but apparently that's pretty tame for these parts and they were all finished by ten. Everywhere seemed pretty grim and there wasn't really a normal bar to hang out in and get a beer, so we hopped back in a cab to the infamous backpackers area Kaosan Road, not far from our guest house. The night ended up in a gig venue where a Thai ska / punk rock band were playing. We had consumed quite a few drinks by this point and moshed the night away drinking beer and gin with some of the local crowd. It was pretty mental, everyone was dancing on the tables! Whoever this band were, they had a big following. At this point we lost Bhrett, I think Bangkok has her now.